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Enlightened Mind

Joined: Mar 26, 2006
Messages: 24
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Just a short story I came up with to dust off my skills. Feedback's appreciated.

 

______________________________________________________________________

She was scared.

"You came to find out what happened to him, right?"

The smooth, deep voice was like liquid amber, a warm blanket surrounding her, but she still trembled, fear chilling her to the bone.

"Y-yes, I d-did..." she stuttered, eyes dilated with fear.

"You will, don't worry. He's all right, just in a different place now."

A reassuring hand on her shoulder didn't completely erase her fear, but it did lessen it somewhat. The nervous woman looked around the room. Seeing as it was in the Slums, it wasn't what you'd call high-class. Water stains adorned the wall, and the zigzags of cracked linoleum mapped out the phenomenally filthy floor. None of that seemed to matter to her, though, as she looked at the two impassive, jumpsuited men standing behind her benefactor.

"W-Who are they, again?"

"Don't worry your pretty little head about it. They're just here to make sure no one disturbs us."

"Oh..." she whispered, relaxing slightly.

"Now, dear, I have a very important choice I need you to make. Do you trust me?"

"Um, I...I mean, yes, I d-do." Clutching her arms tighter around herself, she shivered, feeling an icy breeze wash over her.

"Good, now..."

The man brought his hands out of his pockets, each balled in a fist. Slowly, methodically, he opened one fist. Glistening dully in the dim light, a red pill sat in his hand. Her eyes widened at the sight. She had heard stories, about the thugs that populated the city, calling themselves "redpills", running around with made-up names and such, causing trouble. The man noticed her discomfort and spoke once more.

"I know what you're thinking. You have nothing to worry about. I'll keep you safe, I always do."

She nodded, her breathing slowing down.

"Now, take the red pill, and you can go home. Live out your life and forget everything...and everyone...that had anything to do with this."

He unclenched his other fist, a blue pill nestled in his palm.

"However, take the blue pill, and I'll show you where Nathan went. I'll show you another, more beautiful world, a world where anything is possible, and you never have to be afraid again."

Her eyes widened at the sound of her fiance's name, and a look akin to hunger crept into her eyes. The man smiled softly, knowing how she was, and how she would act. She was in love, after all. It then came as no surprise when her trembling fingers reached out for the blue pill, plucking it out of his palm. She stood there, cradling the pill as if it were a bomb, but also as if it was a priceless gem.

The man put the red pill back into his pocket and made a small gesture to the men behind him. One of them quickly stepped forward, offering the woman a glass of water. She took it, and with visible effort, placed the pill in her mouth and swallowed. She grimaced as the pill slid down her throat and quickly took a mouthful of water to wash it down.


Message edited by ScaramangaZero on 03/14/2009 20:16:52.



Enlightened Mind

Joined: Mar 26, 2006
Messages: 24
Offline

The man moved closer and took the glass from her, placing it on a nearby table. Turning to her, he put his arm around her shoulder and helped her to the couch that sat in the middle of the room. Sitting next to her, he examined her face, eyes searching for any abnormalities. Her blue eyes looked quizzically at him, searching for an answer.

"Don't worry, it'll happen soon." He reassured her.

She merely nodded, and sat back, arms folded across her chest. Minutes crept by, without incident, until she finally spoke.

"Um, when is it going to sta-"was as far as she got before her body went limp, a puppet with its strings cut, eyes rolling back into her head.

The man placed a pair of fingers on her neck for a few seconds. Satisfied that the woman was still alive, he got to his feet and pulled a phone from his belt, dialing a number etched into his memory. The line was answered after a single ring, as usual, and a curt voice spoke a single word.

"Gray."

"This is Draqe. Case #428869, Cassandra Krupp has been subdued. Proceeding with reformatting of the subject." Gone was the silky smooth voice, replaced with a dark, rasping monotone.

"Affirmative. Payment has been deposited in your account, Mr. Polanco. That will be all."

A click, and the line went dead. Draqe holstered his phone and snapped his fingers at the two Machine Exterminators that had been patiently standing there. They nodded and began advancing on Cassandra's prone body. Without waiting to see what they were going to do to her, he turned on his heel and exited the apartment.


Message edited by ScaramangaZero on 03/14/2009 15:04:58.



Enlightened Mind

Joined: Mar 26, 2006
Messages: 24
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Making his way outside, he glanced up at the midday sun shining down. Squinting, he chuckled as he pulled a crumpled pack of cigarettes from his back pocket, pulled one out, and lit it with a worn Zippo that seemed to materialize in his hand. Replacing the cigarette pack and the lighter, he took a deep drag and sighed.

"This is when I'm supposed to say something deep about choice and all that crap, but hell with it. I lied to her, gained her trust, and betrayed her. It was a job." He said, even though there wasn't a person in sight.

Shrugging, he dropped his cigarette on the concrete, crushed it with the heel of his shoe, and began walking. After several meters, he took a breath and jumped, leaping hundreds of feet into the air, quickly becoming a speck against the azure backdrop of the sky.

The cigarette he left behind was still trailing a thin tendril of smoke, until another foot crushed it again. The foot's owner, a woman wearing a trench coat and sunglasses, clenched her fist, teeth bared in fury. She turned to where Draqe had hyperjumped away and screamed in the direction he had gone.

"You bastard! You unbelievable BASTARD!!"

There was no response, for he was gone.

She was angry.




Message edited by ScaramangaZero on 03/14/2009 15:05:11.



Transcendent

Joined: Mar 25, 2006
Messages: 284
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(not bad, but the bluepill keeps her asleep, and the Redpill awakens her. you have it switched)



Enlightened Mind

Joined: Mar 26, 2006
Messages: 24
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I know, I know, people keep telling me.

The point was that he purposely switched them to make sure that she would not wake up, that was his job.

 

I wanted to explore another viewpoint, not of someone making the choice to wake up, but of someone who was manipulated in order to go back to sleep. Cause and effect.




Ascendent Logic

Joined: Dec 3, 2005
Messages: 908
Location: HvCFT Ramesses II
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And a good point indeed. As I see the Exiles/Mervs - they don't want everyone with Neo-like abilities eff'ing up their business on a daily basis, so why awaken those that do intend to do just that? (Could be Zion could be Mech). A littly lying goes a long way SMILEY Great story!



Femme Fatale

Joined: Aug 16, 2005
Messages: 2201
Location: HvCFT Ishtar
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Cool.

 

 

Lyr


 
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